READING TOGETHER "WHEN SINNERS SAY I DO"

Posted by Pastor George

Friday, February 15, 2008

I am so excited for you if you are a husband or wife who attends Faith Bible Church. If you do not, you can follow along over the next 10 weeks on what will be a great journey.

This journey is through the book, “When Sinners Say I Do, Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage.” I have read many and perhaps too many books on marriage. Some have been very useful. Most are filled with a worldly perspective that misses the biblical meaning of marriage. Then last year I picked up “When Sinners Say I Do” and it was not long into the book I cried out “FINALLY!” Pastor Dave Harvey gets it and expresses what marriage is all about and the hope we have to live a Christ-honoring, gospel-centered marriage.

Dave Harvey states that the biggest problem for me and my marriage is found in Galatians 5:17, “For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do.” In other words, marriage is the union of two people who arrive toting the luggage of life. And that luggage always contains sin.

The point of “When Sinners Say I Do” is not a depressing thought. It recognizes that to get to the heart of marriage, we must deal with the heart of sin. Thomas Watson once said, “till sin be bitter, Christ will not be sweet.” This is the profound truth of the gospel. Until we understand the problem, we will not delight in the solution. Grace is truly amazing because of what we were saved from.

And now the special part. Due to the generosity of a couple who have found and continue to find the benefit of pursuing the gospel in their marriage, they have arranged that we can give a free copy of this book to each couple at Faith Bible Church who will commit to reading and discussing it among themselves over the next 10 weeks. I will introduce you to the book Sunday morning and we will give you your copy which the author Dave Harvey, in appreciation of what we are going to do, has personally signed.

We will play a short video each Sunday before the worship service of Dave introducing the chapter and then I will post on this site discussion questions and application challenges.

Join us for an adventure over the next 10 weeks that gives the potential for you and your marriage to be completely transformed by the power of God through the gospel of Jesus Christ.

DON'T PANIC TODAY!

Posted by Pastor George

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Andy Farmer from Covenant Fellowship Church, Glen Mills PA has come to our rescue. He writes:

It’s Valentine’s Eve, and at this point the world of married couples is divided into two camps – those who have made plans to celebrate Valentine’s Day, and those who haven’t. For those who have, congratulations on your foresight, may your Valentine’s Day be a truly romantic experience.

However, for those who haven’t made plans, let me offer some practical advice (from experience – both good and bad) on how to rescue your Valentine’s Day.

First, some DON’TS:

DON’T panic. Valentine’s-oriented businesses make their money on people who panic and go for the big score to rectify a missed opportunity. Don’t buy into it.

DON’T be guilt-motivated. Your spouse can tell the difference between a thoughtful gift or romantic plan and something you’ve thrown together out of guilt. Trust me, its along way from guilt to romance.

DON’T judge or compare. I think every couple who has been married for more than a few years has an experience where one spouse’s romantic gesture seems a little more, let’s say, substantial, than the other’s. Let’s not be critical of any attempts to express love or romance.

And that leads us to some ‘DO’S’.

DO be grateful for whatever your spouse does to show love, even if it is not much different than what they might do any other day. Last time I checked Valentine’s Day was not a national holiday. Let’s not raise our expectations simply because the calendar page has flipped.

DO be honest. If you forgot it was Valentine’s Day, or never followed through with something you thought to do, acknowledge it. Consider whether the oversight was due to a sinful motive or selfish neglect. If so, confess and repent to your spouse. And Spouse – you forgive, as you have been forgiven much worse by your Father in heaven.

Do carve out a special moment. Valentine’s Day is 24 hours long. Work together to carve out a little piece of it as mutual declaration of your love for each other and your commitment to a God-glorifying marriage. Twenty minutes of ‘stop everything, you matter to me’ will do much more to build your marriage than panic driven, guilt motivated, budget busting last minute extravagance.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

GIVING CONSIDERATION TO MY WAYS - Part 2

Posted by Pastor George

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Question 3 on the list of 31 questions to consider brings me to a Valentines Day suggestion and counsel to you men. The question is, "What is the single most important thing you could do to improve the quality of your family life this year?" My answer is shaped by one of my favorite authors and speakers, C.J. Mahaney from his book, “Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God”

I learned much from the book, but in particular after 35 years of marriage, I learned I needed to be far more intentional in devoting time each week with Deb. For the past 37 years, I have studied Deb and I do know what pleases her, excites her, honors, encourages, and refreshes her. I still have more to learn but I know much now. From that knowledge of studying and gathering information about her, I have committed myself in answering question 3 by intentionally planning each week how I can surprise her in ways to lead and love her. The key that I learned from C.J. is planning. I start each week with my date/time book (I have yet to be converted to a PDA). As part of planning for the week is a planned encounter with Deb. I am not much with creative romantic ideas but I know that Deb appreciates even the clumsy attempts.

An example was this past week and my desire to as C.J. puts in the book, “to touch the heart and mind of your wife before you touch her body.” I suggested to Deb we go for a ride on our horses. Now you need to understand that this was not just a romantic gesture on my part, but was actually of the heroics of the grand stories of the Knights of the Roundtable. Deb loves to ride and the weather is not a factor to her. I’m ok with riding when the weather is good. Deb grew up on horses, I was chased by horses in New York with police in the saddle. Monday was pretty cold, a front was coming in, and my horse, Dakota, had not been ridden in quite awhile and he is to put it mildly, very spunky. Ride was 5 miles on the road – I traveled at least 7 with Dakota through the extra moves of circles, swerves, spins, and a few vertical yards at times from bucking. I was freezing to death and to make the story short, I impressed my wife in incredible ways. Not only in taking the time to do this, but in my riding skills which was actually my looking like I was in control but actually was the grip of one in terror.

Men, take time to study, gather data, and implement a plan of romance to your wife. Valentines Day is an expected opportunity. Why not “touch her heart and mind” each week with intentional plans of impressing her.

GIVING CONSIDERATION TO MY WAYS - Part 1

Posted by Pastor George

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

In one of the previous posts, I presented 31 questions to think through from Don Whitney. Deb and I this morning talked about question 8 and Saturday will get to question 9. The conversations have been sweet and at times heavy to the potential impact. I am not going to share answers to all the questions for we live in enough of a glass house and some of the answers fall into special intimacy between us, but here are a few thoughts from my side.



Question 1 - what one thing I could do this year to increase my enjoyment of God? For myself, the spiritual disciplines are essential but in the midst of these, to increase my understanding of contemplation and communion with God through meditation and prayer. In particular growing in my understanding of the gospel. The cross presents so many riches that seem to be endless in expression. I also want to help lead Deb in her enjoyment of God through my leadership and encouragement. We read through the Bible together using the M'Cheyne daily Bible reading plan and we finished last year reading the Old Testament once, the Psalms and New Testament twice. Two chapters each day were read privately and approximately two chapters each day were read publically. Now we did not do our public reading each day but would usually read 3-4 days together where I would read aloud one chapter and then Deb would read aloud one chapter until we caught up. There were a few times we had marathon sessions that might have resembled Nehemiah 8:3, "and he read from it before the square which was in front of the Water Gate from early morning until midday..." That way we read the Word privately, spoke God's Word, and heard God's Word. We finished the year on schedule. We are doing it again this year switching what we read privately last year to the public reading and vice-versa.



So what are you doing this year to increase your enjoyment of God? What are you doing to increase your spouse's enjoyment? How about those kids? May we all grow in our delight of God.