QUESTION OF THE WEEK:
Question: What is baptism?
Answer: Baptism is a holy ordinance in which immersion in the water in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit signifies our being joined to Christ and sharing the benefits of what He accomplished for us on the cross and through His resurrection.
Scripture: Matt 28:19; Rom 6:3-5; Col 2:12; Gal 3:27.
ANOTHER “AND THEN THE FIGHT STARTED”
(Maybe this really happened)
I recently turned 60 and have learned not to get too sensitive about the signs of age. But I do recall when my wife, Deb, had turned 40 and she was getting a little sensitive about the signs of advancing age. When she found a prominent gray hair in her bangs, she pointed to her forehead and asked me, "Oh no, have you seen this?"
"What?" I said. "The wrinkles?"
And then it started…
FAMILY WORSHIP
Last week I shared an article that was intended to take some of the pressure off of making family worship into something it is not supposed to be and perhaps spiritually discouraging to a family. To those who are just being lazy, the reality of Proverbs on the lazy man will probably be realized; but to those who are making an effort towards family worship but finding it difficult to do often, hopefully the article helped relieve any unnecessary guilt.
This week’s article is to help with those who want to renew or get family worship started in their home that is gospel-centered and not just moralizing stories from the Bible.
How to do Family Worship: The Basics
By Rick Thomas
How do you do family worship?
Do you experience regular family worship?
What comes to your mind when you think about family worship?
When a spouse or couple comes to me for help, typically there are a few things that have not been regularly happening in their family.
One of the more common breakdowns in their family culture is a lack of understanding and practice of family worship.
When you think about family worship what do you think about?
Jot down a couple of thoughts before you read further…or note a few ideas in your mind. If you ask most people what comes to mind when they think of family worship, they will say something about praying, reading, studying, and/or singing together. They will also talk about the challenges of having regular family worship because of the frenetic pace of their lives.
Interestingly enough, the Bible does not make a case for family worship, as understood in the way that I have described it.
Family Worship & the One Minute Manager
If we interpret family worship as a mini-package that must be incorporated into some part of our day and life, then it won’t be long before we trim it down to our commute to work or while the make-up is applied.
Anytime you redefine something from how the Word of God talks about it then the whittling or diminishing process begins.
Family worship, as described above, is one of those sub-biblical ideas that has been sent back through the rinse cycle a few times and if it is part of the family dynamic at all, it is marginalized at best. Quite frankly, swim teams and soccer practices are more important.
What is worship anyway?
Acknowledging that someone or something else is greater – worth more – and by consequence, to be obeyed, feared, and adored. Worship is the sign that in giving myself completely to someone or something, I want to be mastered by it. – Harold Best, Music Through the Eyes of Faith, p 143
Worship is the believer’s response of all that they are – mind, emotions, will, body – to what God is and says and does. – Warren Wiersbe, Real Worship, p 26
Worship of the living and true God is essentially an engagement with him on the terms that he proposes and in the way that he alone makes possible. – David Peterson, Engaging with God, p 20
I think with these definitions in mind, it is kinda hard to fit what has become a traditional and cultural understanding of family worship into what has been described by these men.
Family worship has to be something else. There has to be a better way to think about it, as well as a better way to pull it off. Too many of us have been living under self-imposed guilt for too long because we can’t make our fast-paced life and whittled down, pre-packaged understanding of family worship fit within our day-to-day preferences. A clearer understanding of family worship would release us from this unnecessary pre-packaged contrivance.
Components of a dynamic family who worships
The following is how I breakdown family worship.
- Modeling - There are few things any person in your family could do to express their worship of God better than imitating Him. What greater thing can a son or daughter say than, “Dad, I want to be just like you?” In Ephesians 5:1 and 1 Corinthians 11:1 we are appealed to imitate and follow Christ. One of the most profound marks that I can leave on my family is my authentic example of the Christ-life through my attitude and behaviors. Though I could teach them many things out of the Bible each night of their lives, if I am not living it out before them, then there is a good chance they will renounce my “religion” due to my hypocrisy.The first point in family worship must be my authentic, practical, and passionate walk with God, before my family.
- Confession - Part of what it means to model the Christ-life before your family is the public confession of your sins before your family. As you know, you are not Christ. You sin. And I do too. Therefore, what you and I have to do in order to imitate (model) Christ effectively is to daily remove the sin that hinders us from that authentic imitation. Imagine teaching your children about how to be a Christian when you’re not being a Christian due to your lack of acknowledging the times when you’re not a Christian. (It’s a bit wordy, but think about it.) My children will know that I am genuinely trying to model the life of Christ through my daily confession of sin.If you do not do this, then your family will soon determine that the message of Christ is not an absolute, but an option. And they may choose to leave it, rather than take it.
- Forgiveness – Tied to the humble confession of sin is the regular activity of going to your family members and seeking their forgiveness. It is not possible to live with any human and not sin against them. And when you do sin, it has to be dealt with. If it is not, then it will take its revenge on you and your family. Have you been around a family that has not regularly sought forgiveness from each other? If so, then you are well-aware of the revenge of sin. It has taken its toll on that family. You know it. You see it. They carry the scars and brokenness of unconfessed and unforgiven sin in their lives.It is a beautiful thing when you humbly model the power of the Gospel before your family. Can I say it this way: It makes God happy when you take the cross serious by accessing its strength and applying it to your sin?
- Repentance - Confession is awesome. Forgiveness is fantastic. Repentance is where you authentically change. It is though we have made a full circle here. Take note: It is only when you confess, seek forgiveness, and repent that you can accurately model the life of Christ before your family. If you do not do these things, then nothing you do really matters.The full range of the Gospel is put on display when you repent. Remember, that was the whole point of the Gospel in the first place? Christ came to change sinners. This happens when you repent. It would not be an act of worship if you did not repent. God’s name is made great when our lives are changed into the image of His Son.
- Teaching – This point is typically where most Christians begin when they think about family worship. I would not recommend that you begin thinking about family worship as teaching, singing, and/or praying. There is a place for that and we must make sure we have it in its place, its proper place. If we are not doing the first four things on this list, then the last one may turn our kids against us and God.It happens more than you might think. Parental hypocrisy dismantles Christianity in the lives of children. Don’t do this at home.
Too often when we think about family worship, we think about time allotments with God within the 24 hours we have in the day or the 168 hours we have in our week. There is a difference between a diet and a lifestyle change.
A diet is seasonal or temporary, while targeting the quick fix. It is never sustainable or fully appreciated over the long haul of a person’s life. A lifestyle change, on the other hand, is comprehensive and valued, while targeting the whole person for his/her whole life. There is a world of difference and effect.
If you want to do “family worship” the way it is typically understood and practiced in our culture today, then grab God and go. “I’ll have a burger, fries, and a diet coke, please.”
If you want to actually worship God in your family, then I recommend you get some help to learn more about the first four things on this list and once you truly understand this and are regularly living it out, then let’s sing, pray, and read our Bibles together…or whatever other pieces you want to bring into your family worship.
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