Responsibilities to Embrace For Our Children
“Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
Proverbs 22:6
I have covered so far that God has given promises in regards to us as parents that are directed towards our children. Our responsibility is to pursue those promises believing them by faith. God has given us commandments that we are to joyfully and faithfully obey knowing that they lead to our good as well as to our children’s welfare. We then know that to really understand our children, we look to God’s Word and believe what God has said about our children, not believing our children.
These all help us shape a biblical view of our children that will be accurate and provides a clearer vision as to where to go with all instruction and training. . If we are to “parent by faith,” it implies a future orientation to our parenting. We are moving to a place where our children will one day be ready to leave home and cleave to a husband or wife, prepared to raise the next generation pointed toward “placing their confidence in God, not forgetting the works of God, and keeping His commandments.”
This lesson is to look at some of the biblical responsibilities that we are to assume. As we possess these and act upon them, we are able to look at where we want to go with our children. It is creating a God-centered vision so that the methods we use to instruct, train and correct along with our actions will be directed toward these ends and not the whims of the moment.
RESPONSIBILITIES:
1. The Word of God is sufficient to all our questions about parenting. 2 Timothy 3:16, “All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness.” Though the Word of God does not give specific instruction for every contingency of life, it does provide everything we need to know on what is God’s requirement and desire for us as husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, and our children. It is the authoritative Word for us in these areas.
2. The husband-wife relationship is the most important human relationship. This includes over your children if you are not a single parent. Marriage is designed and declared to be a life-time, one-flesh relationship. Your children are not designated as such but are described in Scripture as a gift from God. They will one day leave your home to cleave to another and establish a one-flesh relationship. This is important to understand when priorities seem to be conflicting between your marriage and parenting as to what may be of higher importance.
3. The husband/father is to bear responsibility for the welfare and direction of his wife and children. Ephesians 5:23, “For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.” Ephesians 6:4, “And fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” Space and time do not allow for the full discussion here but briefly, just as Christ assumed responsibility for my sin on the cross that He did not commit; so a husband and father is to assume the responsibility for his family as a means to magnify the picture of Christ in his home. A husband/father who does not accept this is still responsible. He now becomes responsible for his irresponsibility and thus his disobedience and the fruit of it through his wife and children.
4. A parent has a tremendous influence over the direction their child will take both good and evil. R. L. Dabney wrote, “Having a child is to kindle a spark that can never be put out. That child, blessed or cursed, will exist forever and ever.” There are no guarantees, but the best chance a child has for a peaceful future is a Christ-centered home. Poorly raising a child is to provide the best chance also for a child that will not experience peace unless by the intervention of God.
5. A parent is to assume responsibility for the culture and the inputs in their child’s life. Deuteronomy 6: 6-9; “And these words, which I am commanding you today shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and (you) shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. And you shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.” Note the “you” and not someone else. Though you may turn your child over to a school and church for instruction and training, they become ex-facto parents with the ultimate responsibility still being “you.”
6. You can despise your children by neglecting them or by paying too much attention to them. Neglect can come about by being diverted with self-centered interests and overlooking your children. Paying too much attention speaks for itself as it teaches your child self-centeredness and leads to spoiling them which is potentially destructive to their heart.
7. Discipline is not a substitute for regeneration. As with a prior lesson, our children are sinners and are in need of regeneration by the Holy Spirit. Good discipline practices can help channel sinful behavior into good behavior, but that is all that happens. There are many good behaving, lost children. Ephesians 2 states, “And you were dead in your trespasses and sins…But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ…” Our ultimate desire is that good behaving children will be alive in Christ thus the importance of a Gospel-preaching home in word and practice.
8. Young children are dependent upon their parents and progressively grow towards independence. It takes wisdom as to how to allow a child to grow to independence. To do this without a plan is to invite chaos and more bad decisions than necessary. Parents who give too much independence too soon, invite a child to sin for they lack the wisdom and skill for such a time. A parent that holds on too long may “provoke a child to anger.” Though a child must accept responsibility for their anger, a parent must also accept responsibility for their culpability in the sin.
Next week we will begin to look at goal-setting for our children. It goes along with the Faith Family Forum coming up where we will look at priorities and how do we make sure we are intentionally living in accordance with a God-centered vision for our families.
“Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
Proverbs 22:6
I have covered so far that God has given promises in regards to us as parents that are directed towards our children. Our responsibility is to pursue those promises believing them by faith. God has given us commandments that we are to joyfully and faithfully obey knowing that they lead to our good as well as to our children’s welfare. We then know that to really understand our children, we look to God’s Word and believe what God has said about our children, not believing our children.
These all help us shape a biblical view of our children that will be accurate and provides a clearer vision as to where to go with all instruction and training. . If we are to “parent by faith,” it implies a future orientation to our parenting. We are moving to a place where our children will one day be ready to leave home and cleave to a husband or wife, prepared to raise the next generation pointed toward “placing their confidence in God, not forgetting the works of God, and keeping His commandments.”
This lesson is to look at some of the biblical responsibilities that we are to assume. As we possess these and act upon them, we are able to look at where we want to go with our children. It is creating a God-centered vision so that the methods we use to instruct, train and correct along with our actions will be directed toward these ends and not the whims of the moment.
RESPONSIBILITIES:
1. The Word of God is sufficient to all our questions about parenting. 2 Timothy 3:16, “All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness.” Though the Word of God does not give specific instruction for every contingency of life, it does provide everything we need to know on what is God’s requirement and desire for us as husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, and our children. It is the authoritative Word for us in these areas.
2. The husband-wife relationship is the most important human relationship. This includes over your children if you are not a single parent. Marriage is designed and declared to be a life-time, one-flesh relationship. Your children are not designated as such but are described in Scripture as a gift from God. They will one day leave your home to cleave to another and establish a one-flesh relationship. This is important to understand when priorities seem to be conflicting between your marriage and parenting as to what may be of higher importance.
3. The husband/father is to bear responsibility for the welfare and direction of his wife and children. Ephesians 5:23, “For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.” Ephesians 6:4, “And fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” Space and time do not allow for the full discussion here but briefly, just as Christ assumed responsibility for my sin on the cross that He did not commit; so a husband and father is to assume the responsibility for his family as a means to magnify the picture of Christ in his home. A husband/father who does not accept this is still responsible. He now becomes responsible for his irresponsibility and thus his disobedience and the fruit of it through his wife and children.
4. A parent has a tremendous influence over the direction their child will take both good and evil. R. L. Dabney wrote, “Having a child is to kindle a spark that can never be put out. That child, blessed or cursed, will exist forever and ever.” There are no guarantees, but the best chance a child has for a peaceful future is a Christ-centered home. Poorly raising a child is to provide the best chance also for a child that will not experience peace unless by the intervention of God.
5. A parent is to assume responsibility for the culture and the inputs in their child’s life. Deuteronomy 6: 6-9; “And these words, which I am commanding you today shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and (you) shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. And you shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.” Note the “you” and not someone else. Though you may turn your child over to a school and church for instruction and training, they become ex-facto parents with the ultimate responsibility still being “you.”
6. You can despise your children by neglecting them or by paying too much attention to them. Neglect can come about by being diverted with self-centered interests and overlooking your children. Paying too much attention speaks for itself as it teaches your child self-centeredness and leads to spoiling them which is potentially destructive to their heart.
7. Discipline is not a substitute for regeneration. As with a prior lesson, our children are sinners and are in need of regeneration by the Holy Spirit. Good discipline practices can help channel sinful behavior into good behavior, but that is all that happens. There are many good behaving, lost children. Ephesians 2 states, “And you were dead in your trespasses and sins…But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ…” Our ultimate desire is that good behaving children will be alive in Christ thus the importance of a Gospel-preaching home in word and practice.
8. Young children are dependent upon their parents and progressively grow towards independence. It takes wisdom as to how to allow a child to grow to independence. To do this without a plan is to invite chaos and more bad decisions than necessary. Parents who give too much independence too soon, invite a child to sin for they lack the wisdom and skill for such a time. A parent that holds on too long may “provoke a child to anger.” Though a child must accept responsibility for their anger, a parent must also accept responsibility for their culpability in the sin.
Next week we will begin to look at goal-setting for our children. It goes along with the Faith Family Forum coming up where we will look at priorities and how do we make sure we are intentionally living in accordance with a God-centered vision for our families.
